|
|
Back to the Atkins: Year Two site.
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 19 Aug 2002
# of Times Exercised:
Current Goal: |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
I've decided to take a break from my diet for a couple of weeks. I've been stuttering on it since the beginning of the month due various reasons plus I have a vacation and a Gaming Convention coming up at the end of the month. Rather than try half-heartedly to stay on it, fail and feel guilty, I'm just pressing the pause button.
I've been on the Atkins diet for just over a year now and I've lost 55-60 pounds. That's a good deal of weight. But... I've lost my enthusiasm and my momentum. It's time for me to relax a little and start fresh again on Sep 9th, the Monday after my vacation. I think I'm going to modify my Atkins log to do the first year Aug 2001 to Aug 2002, then start fresh and new as of Sep 2002. Literally act as if this is the first time on the diet. All my past successes and failures will be in the past. Year 2 will be a clean slate.
I think, in an odd way, I have been held back by my past success, not really worrying enough about my recent slow down to honestly work on it. Dieting is work. Exercising is work. This diet has been the easiest diet I've ever been on and stuck to... but lately I've grown sloppy and lazy. I'm skipping my walks and my knee exercises. I'm indulging too much in carbs and not really getting into ketosis. Mostly because when someone asks how much weight I've lost, I can chirp proudly, "60 pounds so far." Then though I know.... the first 40 pounds had been lost in 2001 and I've been slow going in 2002.
So... I'm hitting the reset button. When someone asks from now on (well, starting in September), I'm going to answer "So far this year... 5 pounds." Or something like that. The bigger number made me lazy and proud. The smaller number is going to make me itchy to make it bigger. I get a lot of pleasure at telling my watchers the larger number and having people notice... "Gosh, Jenn... you look like you're loosing weight again." But, that's something I haven't heard in about 2 months.
I know I'm going to gain some weight in this relaxed period. It is bound to happen. So, I'll have to create a new chart of mini-goals and treats. Now that I think about it, I feel that this is definitely the right course of action. It's like speeding up a hill. Sometimes, you have to take your foot off the gas for a moment before stepping on it to go faster again. I think that's what has happened to me.
So... as of now, no more weigh-ins until September 9th.
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 12 August 2002
# of Times Exercised: 3
Current Goal: 260 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
My weight is up another pound. While it's not a good trend, it's understandable since I'm in the middle of my period. I have to admit, it's been real hard lately to stick to the straight and narrow. I know I need to, though. Especially with a convention coming up at the end of the month. I just need to find the inspiration I had last year. |
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 5 Aug 2002
# of Times Exercised: 0
Current Goal: 260 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
My weight is way up. Six pounds. I'm not surprised. I've spent the last week wantonly binging because of the death of one of my foster kittens. The day she was put to sleep, because of contracting cerebellar hypoplasia, I went out and got Krispy Kreme donuts, chips and ice cream. I knew exactly what I was doing and why. I was eating for comfort. I turned my brain off and ate. I let the sugar and the carbs take me where they wanted.
By the second day, when I was a little bit more calm, I really thought about what I was doing and I decided that, sometimes, circumstances should allow for diet breaks and I gave myself permission to eat whatever I wanted, whenever and however much I wanted for the next week. I knew I was grieving. I still am. I really loved that little kitten.
So. That's what I did. I grieved and ate. Ate and grieved. I didn't suppress it. I think... it was the best thing I could have done for myself. Now, I'm ready to put the reigns back on and be good. I noted how I felt when I was off the diet - the fatigue and mood swings and the hunger. It was a good reminder. I am ready for the structure again. I am going into a two week induction to kick start things and to put me on track.
I guess that was the lesson for this week. Sometimes, you have to just let it ride.
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 29 July 2002
# of Times Exercised: 3
Current Goal: 260 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
I think I can easily say that pictures are worth 1000 words...
 (1 August is one year. Close enough. *smile*) |
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 22 July 2002
# of Times Exercised: 4
Current Goal: 260 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
*cheer* I've managed to lose four pounds and reached the 60 pound mark! I'm not at goal #6, yet... but this mini-goal is definitely worth celebrating. *bounce*bounce*bounce* When I went shopping on Sunday, a couple of shirts had to be turned back as too big! So, instead of solidly wearing 22/24 and flirting with 26/28... I'm now 22/24 and flirting with 18/20. That is so wonderful to me.
I think it is all the walking I'm doing. Granted, since I started the longer walks, I haven't be able to do as many of them as I wanted to because of the heat and my much-too-busy life. I'll admit, there is a paradoxical sense of relaxation while I walk. I don't think of it in terms of time at all. Only in distance and sides of audio tapes listened to.
I can't recommend these long walks enough. Especially with audio tapes. I know music is good for rhythm but it is so repetitive. With an audio book, there is a sense of progress. Of continuing forward as you listen to the story and walk. You really do forget your fatigue when you are engrossed in a story.
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 15 July 2002
# of Times Exercised: 4
Current Goal: 260 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
While I don't normally go for 'the new thing' or whatever is in fad/fashion when it comes to food, I did decide to try out those new Starkist tuna pouchs to see how they taste. For once, the reality of the product lives up to the marketing of the product. Much to my surprise, the tuna was tender, moist and favorful. Much better than the canned tuna I've been eating.
They have three favors: Albacore in water, Chunk Light in Water, Chunk Light in Sunflower Oil. I've only tried the Albacore since I generally prefer that sort of tuna to snack on. For those of you who want an easy low-carb, high protein snack, the flavor pouch is quick and mess free since you don't have to drain it. Just open it and munch with a fork or fingers.
Oh, yes... the kittens approve of the tuna pouches, too. Whenever I go to eat some, I have to make sure they are either in the back or I'm standing in the kitchen. Otherwise, they will swarm me, maiowing with their demands for the yummy tuna.
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 8 July 2002
# of Times Exercised: 6
Current Goal: 260 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
Over the holiday weekend, I walked 11 miles. 11 miles in 4 days. That
really doesn't seem like that much until you realize the break down of
miles per day:
Thursday: 2.4 miles
Recently, I've been really restless and having this odd desire to exhaust
myself. I'm not sure why. I just know is. I mapped out a couple of routes
and started small. Truthfully, 2.4 miles wasn't enough. 4.4 miles really
wasn't enough either. I really should go for the 6 mile hike I planned
out but I keep running into the problem of not having enough material on
one tape to last me the 2+ hours that would take go more than the 4.5
miles. As I'm listening to audio books, just flipping the tape again
won't do it. This is posing a real problem for me.
Looks like I'm going to have to get that audio book adapter that allowed
me to hear the stereo recorded tapes. That way, I can have 3 hours to one
tape instead of 90 minutes. Yeah... I just thought of that. Cool beans.
Good justification to buy... However, I disgress.
I've discovered that I really like these longer walks. They are good for
the energy level and they allow me to become much more familiar with my
neighborhood. I have also discovered that I have muscles in my lower back.
Sorely unused muscles that have begun to protest this sudden influx of
movement. I both like and dislike this soreness.
Maybe I'll start adding them to my daily routine a couple times a week.
Say, Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday. Just the 2 to 3 miles jaunts.
Instead of lounging around my apartment and listening to the tapes...
walking and listening. Of course, the kittens might not like losing their
favorite pillow.
The point of all this? I didn't know I could walk 4 miles without
collapsing from exhaustion. I didn't know I could or would enjoy these
longer walks. I didn't know it until I did it and that's important.
Oh, yes... just four pounds from my one year Atkins goal of sixty for the year... I should be able to do four pounds in three weeks.
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 1 July 2002
# of Times Exercised: 5
Current Goal: 260 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
July 2002
Total Inches Lost
I'm down to 267.5. It looks like goal #5 is going to stick on the second time around. This is good. In the past two weeks, I've added a CLA supplement to my diet. It's the main ingredient in "Body Solutions" and all of those look alike solutions.
CLA is conjugated linoleic acid - an unique optical isomer of the polyunsaturated fatty acid linoleic acid. CLA is a lipid component of cell membranes and breast milk. CLA has been shown in animal experiments to assist in glucose metabolism, body fat reduction and enhancement of lean body mass (muscle) retention.
Since it isn't a thermogenic of any type, I decided it was safe to add as a supplement because I'm being really careful about thermogenics in general. I have continued to loose and not gain, even with some indulgences. I'm not sure if it is helping or not. I'll continue to use it until I run out and then see what happens after 2 weeks of non-use.
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 24 June 2002
# of Times Exercised: 4
Current Goal: 260 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
I'm down another two pounds to 269 which is excellent considering that I'm in the middle of my cycle when I usually stay flat or go up. I was pretty good this week, keeping most of my indulgences to semi-legal food from Synergy Diet. I do have some opinions on the treats I go last week.
Chocolate cake roll - YUCK! This just did not taste good at all. I don't know why not. I took two bites and ended up tossing the entire thing.
Ross' Chocolate Truffles - Not too bad. Doesn't melt in your mouth in the right way but the taste is pretty good and the carbs are decent.
Judy's raspberry sticks - Well, if you like chocolate covered jellied candy, these are for you. Unfortunately, I didn't realize they were jellied. Not my favorite treat. Still, the quality and take were good.
Judy's triple treats - Really pretty good. A mixture of the vanilla and chocolate caramel with a decent try at marshmellow cream in the middle.
Better Mini chocolate jelly doughnuts - They were more like chocolate muffins with jam and chocolate but they were still good. I enjoyed the taste and texture. Though, they were a little dry.
Keto Chocolate covered Macadamia nuts - Yum! A very good substitute for real chocolate covered nuts. Worth getting.
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 17 June 2002
# of Times Exercised: 3
Current Goal: 270 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
I weighed in at 271. Not bad for indulging almost every day last week. Fortunately, most of my indulging came from stuff from Synergy Diet. I enjoyed having toast for sandwiches and caramels that actually tasted like caramel. I'm still iffy on the chocolate sauce and I haven't made up the Keto ice cream, yet. Soon. I'll let you know how 4 carbs per serving of low carb ice cream tastes when I do. |
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 10 June 2002
# of Times Exercised: 3
Current Goal: 270 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
Last week and this week are two of my "off all thermogenics" weeks, but I doubt that is what caused the weight gain. That was caused by the Taco Bell and many corn chips on Saturday. One of these days, I'm going to remember not to indulge two days before my weigh in. *smile*
I have to admit, though, I'm hoping it takes less time for Goal #5 to stick than it did for Goal #4.
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 3 June 2002
# of Times Exercised: 2
Current Goal: 260 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
*cheer* I've reached Goal #5 - 270 pounds! *fanfare* And there was much rejoicing. Not only that...
June 2002
Total Inches Lost
I don't know if anyone noticed that I didn't do a weigh-in for last week. Probably not because it was a holiday weekend... which is why I didn't do the weigh-in. That and the fact that I was in the middle of my cycle and I had spent the previous weekend indulging completely. It is times like that when cowardess is the better part of esteem. I decided that, given my indulgences and my cycle, I really didn't want to see where I was on the scale.
You know, I had a weight/esteem based topic to wax poetic on.... but darned if I can remember it. Ah, well. Next time.
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 20 May 2002
# of Times Exercised: 2/0w
Current Goal: 270 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
*cheer* Two more pounds lost despite being sick most of last week and not exercising as much. Just 2 more pounds before goal #5! (Though, this weekend is KublaCon, so I'll try to keep the indulging to a minimum. But, no promises.)
It keeps coming to my attention that people seem to think the Atkins program only works because it is low calorie. Some people say you have to eat more to lose more. I don't know. On a whim, I wandered through the Atkins site to find out what their recommended daily caloric intake was. I found out that, although you do not have to count calories, the Atkins program recommends keeping between 1500 and 1800 calories a day.
So, out of mild curiosity, I figured out how much I was eating each day last week.
Monday: 1200
Hmmm. It seemed that, for the most part, I am doing exactly what they recommend. I figured out most week days, because of my routine I'm averaging 700 to 950 calories (2-9 carbs) during the day before dinner with dinner usually being my largest meal of the day in calories, carbs and bulk. The best part about all of this? I rarely ever feel hungry which is one of the most awesome things about being on this diet.
Oh, it is easy to get the munchies even if I'm not hungry. But, that's another issue altogether and one for another time.
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 13 May 2002
# of Times Exercised: 5/2w
Current Goal: 270 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
This past week was a week of small, but important, triumphs.
On Tuesday, I grabbed a pair of jeans from the drawer and put them on... then realized that something wasn't right because I thought I had put on my regular 'fat' jeans but knew that I couldn't have because these jeans were slender in the ankle and my regular jeans are boot cut. I was wondering, "Hey! What jeans are these?!"
It turns out that I had grabbed a pair of my 'skinny' jeans from the drawer and they fit just fine. *cheer* Always a good thing.
Then, on Saturday, I had a LARP to go to and for various reasons, I decided to really do myself up - make up, heels, hair curled and a body revealing outfit in the form of a long slender black knit skirt and black knit scoop neck top. It certainly caused a lot of raised eyebrows and compliments because up until then, I had continued to wear my (now too big) old clothing that just sort of hung on me and hid the fact that I really have lost a significant amount of pounds. It was a good feeling.
Finally, today, I have on a snap shirt, that when I first bought it, I could not even get the ends to meet. Over time, I have watched how it has fit better and better - ends touching, then being able to snap some snaps, then being able to snap all of the snaps even if it stretched a little at the snaps around my hips when I relax my tummy.
This morning, I put it on in a hurry, snapped it all the way closed without thinking about it and went about my business of getting ready for work. Until, while I was brushing my teeth, I noticed in the mirror just how big this snap shirt was on me now. In fact, even with my tummy all the way relaxed, there was NO stretch of the shirt! I even pushed my tummy out and it barely registered against the shirt! I was really surprised and happy!
I love the way my body keeps changing and surprising me. It is proving to me that while I am not losing the pounds like I was in the beginning, I really am still improving my body, losing inches and getting healthier.
Every little triumph -does- count. Never forget that.
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 06 May 2002
# of Times Exercised: 5/2w
Current Goal: 270 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
Well, I did it. I knew with both my Period and my muscle mass gain, I should have just skipped this week's weigh in. But, I didn't. Masochistic as I am, I went ahead and weighed myself. 278. A gain of four pounds. *sigh* Well, not as bad as expected. Ah, well.
So, to make myself feel better, I took my measurements. I lost on all three! *cheer*
Neck - March 2002: 15.5 inches.... Now: 15 inches! (-1/2)
Total Inches Lost
Little things do count. *smile*
Now, onto an interesting topic I call: The Rules of Bingeing - and Surviving it.
01. Realize that occasionally, you /will/ freak out an want to binge.
If you all couldn't tell, I had a binge attack this weekend. For once, I followed my own rules and realized that my eyes were much bigger than my stomach. So, I went out and got two Wendy's Ultimate bacon cheeseburgers. That is something like a pound of meat and cheese. I promised myself that if I was still "hungry" or wanting after I ate all that meat and cheese, I could go out and get whatever I wanted.
As expected, I was so full after eating all that food that I didn't want to move, much less go out and pick up something naughty to eat. Also, instead of jumping into a bad binge-guilt cycle, I felt rather proud of myself and virtuous for dealing with the binge attack as well as I did.
(However, gaming that night was another story... random munchings are deadly. Must figure out a way to combat gaming munching. A topic for another day and time.)
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 29 April 2002
# of Times Exercised: 4/2w
Current Goal: 270 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
It turns out that I wasn't just being a wimp about my knees. I actually do have something wrong with them. Fortunately, there is something I can do about it. Beyond the whole 'lose weight' thing, I've been given some Naproxen to take twice a day for the swelling and Doc Zummuto wants me to take a Glucosamine (500mg) and Chonondritin (400mg) supplement mixture three times a day, starting immediately. Fortunately, I think that's what I have at my office now.
The basic crux of the matter is that the muscles on the outside of my knees are too loose/weak. That's what caused the slight, but painful, hyper-extension of my knees during the last couple of weeks. The prescription for that: thigh exercises to tighten up all of the muscles in my upper thigh and knee.
He showed me a series of exercises that he wants me to do every other day with ankle weights. 5 pounds to start. 10 pounds later. Also, he wants me to start adding ankle (5 pound) and wrist (2 pound) weights to my walks because it will burn more calories and start strengthening my upper body as well.
I started walking with them the next day. OMG!! would just like to note, for the record, that weights SUCK. I can't believe Doc wants me to walk 5 times a week with weights. I may walk 5 times a week, but not with weights. Maybe 2-3 times a week to begin with. I dare anyone who thinks walking is easy to add 5 pound ankle weights and 2 pound wrist weights and tell me how easy it is.
I had to remind myself that this was for the good of my knees. *whimper* Also, while it was ok to be sore *groan*, it wasn't ok to give up *argh*. So, I didn't give up. Also, I don't think I'm going to go into the pain involved in the specific weight training exercises I have to do 3-4 times a week to strengthen my upper thighs. Oww! Oww! Oww!
To all of those sedentary office drones who looked at me funny in my oh-so-stylin' bright blue weights: You're gonna be wolf whistling at me before you know it and I'm not gonna give you the time of day. So there!
Oh... I'm probably going to see a weight gain next week. That time of the month coupled with the weight mass I'm going to start developing from the weight work outs. I'll try not to get too depressed over it.
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 22 April 2002
# of Times Exercised: 3
Current Goal: 270 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
I'm down two more pounds! Only four more pounds until I can do the professional photos! *cheer* Looks like the Carbolizer has definitely helped. However, this week, I am only going to be drinking my Babble Juice(TM) and not taking the Carbolizer, cause the Babble Juice is filled with much caffeine and the Carbolizer prohibits caffeine while taking it. Mostly, I'm giving my body a rest from the ephedrine.
Next week, I won't be using any thermogenics at all to give my body a rest from the artificially high metabolism. I figure, that's not a bad way to go. Two weeks, ephedrine; one week, Results for Women Thermogenic drink (aka Babble Juice cause it makes me very energetic); one week off all stimulants. Repeat until Carbolizer runs out, then alternate on and off weeks with the Babble Juice until another plateau is hit.
BUT, don't forget to exercise and eat correctly. Drugs are not good substitutes for disciplined diet and exercise. They are only supposed to help.
Also... new tidbits of stuff I'm doing on a daily or semi-daily basis. The first is me doing modified push ups every other day. These push ups are definitely modified. As in, I'm still standing when I do them against the counter top. 5 push ups every other day because I want to start working my upper body, too. Not just my lower body on workouts. Already, the push ups are getting easier. Then, I have a very short, 3 1/2 minute killer isolated upper thigh work out that I do daily - and only in the privacy of my own home. What I do, is I put on Heather Alexander's song... "Laddie, Are You Working?" and stand behind my chair. My feet are about shoulder width apart and planted. I slightly crouch, then I do a series of rolling hip thrusts towards the chair to the music. It's silly. It's provocative. It will make you laugh... but it will also have your upper thighs -screaming- for mercy within seconds. I've actually made it to 90 seconds without stopping... that's my record. My goal is to be able to 'dance' to the whole song without dying. Go ahead and giggle at the idea... then download the MP3 and try it yourself. I guarantee you'll still be giggling because of the silliness of the exercise - in-between your groans of pain. *hehehe* Saturday clothes shopping was really fun! Everything I got was a size smaller than expected... and I probably should have gone one size smaller than that, but didn't cause I'm paranoid. I had been wearing 26/28's.... and they were a bit tight. Now, I'm wearing 22/24... and they are a bit loose but I wasn't willing to go to 18/20 - yet. Definitely next time... which will probably be another 6 months from now. You know, they say if you want something done, you have to do it yourself. Well, it appears that this is true with Low Carb support groups. I've recently been told by the Atkins center that they know of no face-to-face support groups for those on a Low Carb diet. So, guess what... I'm creating my own. Welcome to PGCB, the SF Bay Area Low Carb Support Group! To begin with, it's just going to be online and email until I can get a feel for how many people want this kind of face-to-face support group. Then, I'll move it to actual meeting in my apartment complex's rec room. Starting out, just once a month. Like the first Wednesday evening of every month. |
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 15 April 2002
# of Times Exercised: 4
Current Goal: 270 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
*HAPPY HAPPY JOY JOY* I've broken the 277 Barrier! It's only 276, but a pound is a pound is a pound is 3500 excess calories burned and I'll take it! *cheer*
So, the Carbolizer. When I take it, I do notice an increase in energy. The only time I notice an increase in my heart rate is when I forget and have a diet soda with caffeine - which is strictly verboten in the directions for the Carbolizer. Even then, as I was monitoring my heart rate pretty closely, it was only an extra 10-12 beats per minute.
I'm going to keep it up for another week, then take a week off to give my body a rest from the elevated metabolism.
And just because sometimes it is important to keep things in perspective and take stock....
Top reasons I want to lose weight:
I want to protect my knees from the arthritis.
I want to be able to sit in a resturaunt seat with it being too small and painful for me.
I want to be able to fly with Kevin in his private airplane.
I want to stand out in a crowd because of my eyes, my hair, my clothes... anything except my weight.
I want to be content with who I am.
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 8 April 2002
# of Times Exercised: 5
Current Goal: 270 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
I'm down to 277. I haven't broken 277, yet. Ever. I've now decided that I don't want the tattoo for Goal #5. I found a place that does neat glamour photos in both hard and soft copy. So, Goal #5 is now going to be a nice set of head shots. (I can hear my Mom cheering over this change already. She didn't like the tattoo idea and she's been wanting new pictures of me for a long time.)
I've also decided to give myself a bit of a boost to get me off this plateau - knowing both the dangers and benefits of what I am doing. I have decided to add a thermogenic supplement to my diet for a short time. What this is, is an herbal supplement that speeds up the metabolism. The one I have chosen is called: Carbolizer. It is designed to help the system burn through carbs even faster and to keep the metabolism in a high energy state.
It does this using Ephedrine. There are -many- warnings about Ephedrine. However, I don't have high blood pressure. Nor do I drink caffeine on a regular basis. So... I'm going to try it out. If it starts doing funky things to me, I'll stop immediately.
I've made a promise to myself that, if I decide to continue the use of the Carbolizer, I will only use it for the one bottle. This is /only/ to get me off this plateau. I am determined not to be addicted to it, nor to use it as a necessary crutch. There are too many dangers associated with it.
If it does do bad things to me, I'll stop it, flush my system, then move to a thermogenic that is caffeine based. We all know the dangers and benefits of caffeine. *smile* I don't think caffeine will kill me. Just give me some nasty heartburn.
Oh, on to reviews: Protein Shakes - I'm not really fond of the shakes, but sometimes, I'm just not that hungry in the evenings but I know I shouldn't skip a meal. Something like a protein shake would be ideal. I tried two of them this weekend.
Atkins Chocolate - 5 carbs. Serve very cold. I'll give it a 6/10. It was ok. Better than the vanilla. I don't think I could drink it on a regular basis but it would do in a pinch. It has a decent enough chocolate taste but it does have a slight unpleasant after taste.
Pure Protean Chocolate - 7 carbs. Serve very cold. I'll give it a 7/10. It was fairly good. It has a good chocolate taste and no after taste. Again, I don't think I could drink it on a regular basis but it would do in a pinch.
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 1 April 2002
# of Times Exercised: 0
Current Goal: 280 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
This is just too depressing for words. |
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 25 March 2002
# of Times Exercised: 5
Current Goal: 270 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
I'm down 2 pounds much to my pleasure. I did do extra exercise this week and maybe that helped. I'm also debating about the possibility of being strict no carbs during the week and lax no carbs on the weekends. That way, I won't get myself into a nasty guilt cycle over indulging a little on weekends.
A new victory concerning my weight loss. I decided to do measurements because the pounds aren't coming off very fast but my clothing is still fitting better. I took three measurements: neck, waist, hip. Actually, I did all this because I pulled out a pretty hematite necklace I've never been able to wear and put it on.... and it fit beautifully. I know it's a 16 inch necklace. Sooo...
Neck - Original: 17.5 inches.... Now: 15.5 inches! (-2)
It's really silly, but I'm more pleased about the loss of inches around my neck than my waist. (Not that I'm knocking the waist.) I've always considered myself to have a very elegant neck. At least, until I gained weight. Now, I'm getting that neck back.
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 18 March 2002
# of Times Exercised: 2
Current Goal: 270 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
Well, I've hit 280 again. This is time #3 for goal #4. I'm happy that I've gone down again. It looks like I'm going to have to start exercising more again. That's when I was loosing the most amount of weight. That, and when I wasn't eating all of the low carb chocolate and other treats. So, I'm going to start limiting my in take of those kinds of foods, too. Not to mention, I'm going to go back to eating boiled eggs in the morning instead of the Carb Solution bars. I'm thinking all of the processed foods are having an adversed affect on my body, and thus, the diet.
Plateaus suck. So, I'm moving back to what I was doing before when I was loosing the weight on a regular basis. Less processed foods and more exercise. Hopefully, that will do it.
I have to admit, I'm relieved that I did loose some weight this last week. I was beginning to think I was cursed. Also, you can bet I'm going to be jumping for joy when I finally break Goal #5... and I -will- do it. Plateaus have a way of sucking the enthusiasm out of a person. I'm determined not to let it happen to me anymore than it already has.
In other good news, I had to walk to the gargage to pick up my car. I figured that it was 'only' 1-2 miles away and that I should be able to do that. So, distance unknown, I walked there and got my car. Driving back, I tracked the distance - just a smidge over a mile. The great thing was, I wasn't tired, sore or anything. I had walked the mile with no problem. *happy dance*
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 11 March 2002
# of Times Exercised: 1
Current Goal: 280 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
I'm back over 280 again. *sigh* I knew it was coming due to the fact that this is last week I pretty much gave up on the diet. These last few days have been an exercise in self abuse and self sabotage. I don't know why I've been doing this to myself. I just know I have. Also, I have fallen into a weird cycle of apathetic ennui and deliberate numbness of thought concerning consequences of action while I binge then fall into a mixture of guilt, anger and righteous determination not to do it again - until I -do- do it again. Then, my brain shuts off.
I know I'm stressed. I know I'm fighting a depression. I don't know if it's the crap in Marrach that I've been dealing with for the last month. Maybe it's my depression over not having enough material for my novel of short stories... Or the fact that I was so incredibly good last week on my diet and I lost nothing... not a single pound. Maybe it's a combination of all of the above and stuff that I haven't even thought of. Maybe it is a subconscious reaction to moving. I don't know.
I do know that I need to stop this Bingeing, but not Purging, cycle. I need to stop this deliberate self sabotage. I need to stop thinking thoughts of starving myself on Sunday in order to have a weight loss on Monday. I need to finish putting together my apartment so I can feel good about completing something in my life. I need to focus on other things for a bit.
I wonder how long I'll be in this plateau and how many times I'll break the 280 mark before it finally sticks.
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 4 March 2002
# of Times Exercised: 3
Current Goal: 270 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
Thanks to everyone who wrote to me about my whining and self doubt concerning my diet and facing such an emotional and painful tasks. Truthfully, I'm really feeling a lot better. 7 days of angeldom [being such a good girl that I should be considered an angel] and my sugar levels have really stabilized. No big mood swings (save for the randy bits but that's another story.)
Surprisingly, every person who contacted me in email was male. They were all very supportive, encouraging, understanding and even logical about the weight loss and struggle it is. I don't know why I'm so surprised. I guess, I just expected the women to commiserate more with me. I guess it is sort of a biased thing, thinking that men don't really face the same weight issues as women. One of the things I have learned on this diet is that they do. Painfully so.
They have self esteem issues and body image problems. They do wonder how they look in their clothing. They do wonder if that guy over there is privately smirking at their excess weight or if that girl over there is having an internal monologue criticizing their love handles. They are also fighting with common image problem that the only good looking men are tall, slender-waisted and broad-shouldered. I know that it doesn't seem as prevalent as the women weight issues but that doesn't make it any less valid.
You know, it's silly. Why is it so damn hard to do the right thing when the rewards are worth it? I mean, I do feel better emotionally and physically, now that I'm back on the straight and narrow - eating properly and exercising. Hopefully, all this goodness will knock me out of my plateau.
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 25 Feb 2002
# of Times Exercised: 1
Current Goal: 270 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
There are days when I think that dieting is just too hard. I wonder if anyone would care if I stopped trying. I wonder if anyone would notice. Then, I realize that -I- would care and, yes, they would notice. Especially those friends of mine who have really noticed my weight loss and continue to encourage me.
I have lost 46 pounds now. That seems like so much when you look at just that number. But, when I look in the mirror, seeing all of the bumps, rolls and extra curves, I get discouraged. When I think about how that just over only 25% of what I want to loose, I feel like I am swimming against the tide. I feel myself overwhelmed and wonder how on earth I'm going to get through the other 75%.
I've been at a plateau since the beginning of the year. Eight weeks of bouncing around the same 10 pound range. I know part of that was the holiday season, but most of it is my fault because I have not disciplined myself very well. Not like I did in the beginning.
I know it is time to go back to that strict discipline. I know it is time to start recording every single bite and every single carb. I know that I need stick firmly to the 20 carb per day limit, to take my vitamins and to drink all of my water. About the only thing I've really been sticking to is the water bit. Also, I know I need to start exercising again. Start out at 2 times per week then work myself up to 3 or 4 times per week.
I know all this and I just want to whimper, cry and say it is too much to do.
But, pride... damnable pride... just won't let me give it all up. I can't give up. I've never given up on anything in my life. Giving up means disappointing people. I hate disappointing people. I hate disappointing me. So, I'm putting on the stiff upper lip and I'm starting all over again. Going back to the basics and doing everything 'just right' as it should be - no matter how much I hate the thought of it.
Just because this is the easiest diet I've been on, doesn't mean it is easy. Dieting is hard work. It's emotional. It can be very painful. But, the rewards are worth it in the end. I just hope I have the willpower to make it that far. Some days, I wonder if I do. Then, I get back on that frickin' horse, despite the pain, and force it back into a trot.
We'll see how far I make it this time before I fall off again. I guess the trick is to realize that I will fall off... many, many times... and to know the most important thing is that I need to force myself back onto that horse again, no matter how afraid, overwhelmed or discouraged I am.
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 18 February 2002
# of Times Exercised: 2
Current Goal: 280 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
Yes, this was a huge leap upward. *sigh* I probably should have taken a page from Johanna's book and skipped weighing myself this week after the Convention (where I cheated like a mad woman) and was still dealing with my period. But, I didn't. So, there you go. This pretty much cinches my need to get back on the super strick band wagon, counting carbs, etc... I'll probably start that on the 25th.
Sweet treat reviews continue:
The Carb-o-lite vanilla toffee chews pretty much suck. They have a strong artificial sweet flavor that doesn't mix well with the vanilla flavor. They are "zero carb" per serving size - which is one piece. In actuality, they have about 1/2 a carb per piece. They are very chewy, which is good if you like that sort of texture. But, unfortunately, the taste is just yucky. Rate: 3 of 10
The Carb-o-lite peanut butter chocolate bar is very, very good. They are "zero carb" per serving size - which is one square. In actuality, they have about 1/2 a carb per piece. So, the whole bar is about 2 carbs. However, they are well spent carbs. The bar is tasty and not waxy. It has the right texture and taste for peanut butter and chocolate bars. Warning, though. These bars are a bit smaller that the other Carb-o-lite bars and one might run the risk of over eating them. Rate: 7 of 10
The Ross chocolate bars are really pretty good. Good taste and good texture. I especially like the chocolate orange bars. However, one major warning here. Don't eat more than one bar a day. Otherwise you will end up dealing with a rather smelly gastrointestinal mess. Those warnings aren't just for show. Still, the chocolate is worth it in the limited quantities. Rate: 8 of 10
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 11 February
# of Times Exercised: 3
Current Goal: 270 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
Whoo-hoo! I finally reached Goal #4. It's about darned time. I've been hovering around that goal for about 6 weeks now. So, I'm pretty happy about that. Of course, the convention is this weekend. I don't want to blow my victory out of the water. I'm going to try to stick close to the diet as I can but I'm not going to beat myself up for breaking the rules.
It shouldn't be -that- hard. I've already arranged a refrigerator for my room. I'll take boiled eggs, cheese sticks, canned tuna and smoked salmon. That should suffice for the munchies. Maybe I'll pick up some pork rinds for the actual games. I think my biggest problem is going to remain hydrated during the convention.
I've decided my next treat, for Goal #5, is going to be a new tattoo. Actually, I'm getting new ink over old ink. I have a black dagger on my ankle and I think I'm going to cover it with a brown cross. (Heh. I can see Mom now. Wincing over the idea of the tattoo but approving the new symbol. I don't think she's ever liked my little black dagger.)
I'd like to thank Sibyana for pointing out to me that sugar free Jello has zero carbs! Yay! A new sweet treat! We were discussing desserts and sweet treats. I've bought a whole bunch of stuff from the Low Carb Market. They are downstairs in the mail room, just waiting to be delivered to me. I'll let you know how all of the new no/low carb treats are next week.
...
Pure De-Lite Treasure Bite Truffles: Bite sized chocolates that are no sugar, low carb.
Dark Chocolate : Really pretty good. Smooth and rich when sucked on. A little crumbly when chewed. Rate: 7 of 10, #2/4
Milk: Not bad. A slight waxy taste when chewed but very rich and creamy when sucked on. Rate: 6 of 10, #3/4
Milk Almond: The best tasting of the bunch. The almond does away with the waxy flavor. Again, slightly crumbly when chewed but rich and creamy when sucked on. Rate: 8 of 10, #1/4
Milk Crisp: My least favorite of the bunch. I thought it was too artificially sweet and the waxy taste was there. Rate: 5 of 10, #4/4 |
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 4 February 2002
# of Times Exercised: 2
Current Goal: 280 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
Much to my pleasure, I did lose weight this last week, despite the stress of moving from my old place to my new place. I'm down to 281 again. A good thing for me. However, it does mean I missed my Feb 1 mini-goal of losing 5 pounds a month in 2002. I'm not too particularly worried. The year has just started and things have been a lot wonky. Not too much to say, really. Much too concerned with the whole moving, unpacking and decorating issues. |
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 28 January 2002
# of Times Exercised: 2
Current Goal: 280 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
The stress of moving, money worries and my job really did me in on the diet front. I gained back three pounds and I'm not surprised. One of two things happen when I'm stressed. Either I forget to eat and I loose lots of weight or I lose control of my willpower and I cheat rampantly. This last week, I was cheated like crazy. I'm really hoping that things will settle down after the move. We'll see what happens.
On the good side of things, Atkins has put out some breakfast bars. I've tried three but only like one. The blueberry pancake and the lemon poppy seed are way too hard. However, the cinnamon bun one is really tasty and soft. There are a couple other flavors, but I haven't gotten to them yet.
Also, Atkins is now doing chocolate bars. Not bad at all. The milk chocolate actually tastes like chocolate and not wax. That's a very good start. I'm going to have to wander through the Atkins website and see what else they have.
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 21 Jan 2002
# of Times Exercised: 0
Current Goal: 280 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
I lost another four pounds in this last week. That puts me at 280 and just ounces away from my fourth goal! *cheer* However, this means something else.... I have reached my 25% done mark! 40 pounds or 142,000 excess calories burned! *and the crowd goes wild!* Just think of that... One hundred and forty two THOUSAND excess calories burned! *savoring the victory*
Tip: Never pass up an opportunity to congratulate yourself on your loss. It really -is- a big deal.
Yes, I did cheat once, yesterday. I was out with Wendy and we stopped to have Italian ice cream. I had chocolate hazelnut. For the first time in a very long time, I really, really appreciated my cheating. I mean, yes, I really like having pizza. But, I keep forgetting just how much I enjoy the taste of chocolate and hazelnut. This stuff was better than Godiva ice cream. I enjoyed every unrepentant bite!
That's the beauty of this diet. You can occasionally cheat and NOT completely sabotage yourself - as long as you get back on the diet immediately and stick to it. Even if you take a couple weeks off, like I did, for the holidays - you are STILL not sabotaging yourself.
Recently, I've been talking back and forth with a couple of people over email about Atkins and fast food. So, here is what I have discovered:
One of the best fast foods you can get is a bacon cheese burger. You don't even really have to worry about dealing with the bun too much because the bacon protects your cheese from being peeled off when you get rid of the bun. My top three picks for fast food burgers are:
- Jack in the Box's Ultimate bacon cheeseburger
However, some people don't like cheeseburgers or you get tired of them. So, you can do unbreaded chicken or broiled chicken sandwichs - though, I usually have to get two because I get hungry. I usually add the extras of bacon and cheese to them if it is available. My top three picks for fast food chicken sandwiches are:
- KFC's tender roast chicken sandwiches (no sauce)
Then, there are those people who would rather go to Taco bell. I have discovered that YES, you can go to Taco Bell on this diet, if you are careful about what you eat. Pretty much, you are limited to the tacos. I choose soft taco (beef, chicken or steak) in their 'supreme' form. Take it home, scoop out the insides (that's why soft taco, easier to scoop) and toss out the shell - immediately.
That's the trick to all of this fast food stuff - tossing out the bun/shell immediately, before you sit down and then you won't have it sitting there, within arms reach and tempting you. Also, I don't recommend fast food for every day. No more than 2-3 times a week, total. Freshly cooked food is cheaper in the long run in all aspects except time and better for you. But, I understand the occasional need to indulge.
Finally, I have found a GREAT website that lists out all of the Fast Food Facts of calories, fat and even carbs. It really is an eye-opener.
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 14 January 2002
# of Times Exercised: 0
Current Goal: 280 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
Boy, my weight is all over the place. Up five pounds last week. Down six pounds this week, putting me at 284. Actually, I really shouldn't be surprised. I'm back on my diet, no joking around. I didn't exercise last week, but that's OK. I usually ease into things. Maybe this week I'll start my exercising again but no promises.
So far, so good. It's a little hard getting back into the diet because of automatic cravings for those things I cannot have like pizza and ice cream. I think, it is just a knee-jerk reaction to the diet mentality. But, I am finding it easier than last time. I know what I can and can't have. I just have to be careful not to be lazy about those foods that are on the edge.
I'll probably have a decent weight drop next week, barring biology, because it is the second week of being on the diet again. The first two weeks usually end up with a significant loss. But, we'll see.
ACK! I forgot one of THE most important details in loosing weight... drinking all of that damn water! You have no idea how good it is for you, your body and your weight loss. Drinking lots of water offsets the kidney problems you could develop and it also flushes your system of impurities that make your keep your weight.
I KNOW drinking a gallon of water is hard and there are lots of complaints that it 'doesn't taste good.' But, it really is good for you and you will discover after you get over the "peeing every 60-90 minutes" phase that not only to you LIKE the taste of water, you crave it. A very good thing.
My tip for drinking water.... as I do with everything... break it into smaller chunks. Here are two different ways to do it. One, have 8 onces of water once an hour throughtout your work day. I think, you will discover that 8 oz is easier to drink at once if you forget. Much easier and better for you than 24 oz at the end of lunch. Also, I think it will move you into the second way of doing things... I have a 28 oz cup on my desk. I try to drink one cup before lunch and one after. If I do that, I allow myself a soda in the evening. If I don't, I just stick to water. You will find that even with the soda, you will still want the water, too.
Also, mad props to Sarcasmo who lost 115 pounds on the Atkins program! Way to go!
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 7 January 2002
# of Times Exercised: None
Current Goal: 280 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
I'm back to 290. That's up 5 pounds from last week. Not especially surprising since, pretty much, I didn't start my diet again until Monday. Sure, I had plenty of good excuses for not starting the diet. Here are the top few:
1. Didn't go grocery shopping. So, I didn't have any legal food in the house.
Now, I am. My fridge and freezer are properly stocked. I've started a new week. The left over treats have dwindled to nothing. No more excuses. Especially now that some people have started emailing me for advise on the Atkins Diet.
The most frequent question I am getting these days is: Does it really work?
My answer: Yes. But it is a -qualified- yes. You -must- stick to it. You must not cheat. For the first month, still to 20 grams of carbs a day and no more. After that, you can go up to as much as 40 grams, but that's it. It is better that you eat an extra full steak or three eggs and 6 slices of bacon than to eat a single piece of toast. No pizza. No potatoes. No pasta.
Also, I recommend that you exercise. It is not required to lose the weight but you'll lose the weight faster. It will also give you another goal to look forward to.
Finally, my top tips:
1. Weigh yourself /only/ once a week - at same time/day each week, wearing the same thing. Me? When I get up on Monday morning, I put on my slippers, go to the bathroom, then get on the scale. That means every time I weigh myself, I am always only wearing my nightgown and my slippers.
2. It is better, for the first week or two, to over stuff on the legal foods than risk being hungry. You are going on a diet. That means that your mind has a lot of psychological barriers to overcome - the first of which is the fear of being deprived. Go ahead and eat that extra pork chop or cheeseburger (sans bun). Get your mind used to the idea that it is not supposed to be hungry and that it WON'T be hungry. You are allowed to eat as much as you want of all legal foods.
3. Get rid of those tempting treats. Out of sight, out of mind. If all your food is legal, you won't be tempted to have that frozen pizza. Stock your fridge and freezer with those things you can have. Especially quick grab snack food: beef jerky, pepperoni sticks, pork rinds, avocados, etc...
4. For the first month, keep a food diary - in particular, keep strict accounting of your carbs.
5. If you cheat, it's not the end of the world. Just get back on the strictest form of the diet and stick to it.
6. Keep track of your little goals. Soon, you'll see that your little goals add up to a lot. And be realistic about your goals. A woman will lose only 1-2 pounds a week on average. A man will loose only 1-3 pounds per week.
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 31 December 2001
# of Times Exercised: None
Current Goal #4: 280 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
Back from my vacation. I have gotten sick. I don't know if it is from eating poorly or being in snow or a high altitude or from being around others who were sick. Probably a bit of both. I guess I wasn't as bad as I thought I was since I did lose a couple pounds. I think that comes from eating what I want until I was full and leaving the rest.
Strangely enough... I'm really looking forward to going back on my diet. I guess I like the routine of it. This year, 2002, I am shooting for a goal of 5 pounds a month. I really think that is a realistic goal and keeps in mind holidays and plateaus and such. So, my year end goal for 2002 will be 225 pounds. Obviously, I'm not going to stop if I go past that.
Here we go... a year in review.
Week 00: 30 July - 323 pounds |
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 24 December 2001
# of Times Exercised: 1
Current Goal #4: 280 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
On vacation. Eating what I want. When I want. Fun, but kinda tiring. I don't feel as good as I could and I know it. |
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 17 Dec 2001
# of Times Exercised: 2
Current Goal #4: 280 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
I'm back up to 287. Yeah, obviously, I went off my diet last week and pretty much, I'm not going to be on my diet again between now and January 2nd. However, I am going to try to stick to it somewhat. Mostly meats and veggies. The problem is, simply, carbohydrates are addicting. It's a hard thing to get over.
I stick to my diet. I eat good, I feel good. I go off my diet. I eat like crap, I feel like crap. It's a pretty clear one-to-one correspondence. Yet, I continue to eat the crap and I don't really understand why I do it. Which is really stupid to me. It makes me angry. But, I still go on and munch happily on that holiday cookie/cake/pie/treat and I so regret it later.
I guess, at this point, I should be happy that I have made my year-end goal and should not beat myself up over the inevitable holiday weight gain. Also, hope that I don't end up gaining too much back. January will be a tough month but, at least, I won't be alone in it.
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 10 December 2001
# of Times Exercised: 2
Current Goal #4: 280 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
This being my Birthday weekend and knowing that I was going to cheat, I prepared myself for no loss or some gain. Well, looks like my body gave me my own present. A three pound loss. I'm at 284 now. Considering that I did cheat twice, once on Thursday, eating chocolate and, of course, on Sunday for my Birthday dinner, this is excellent.
My punishment for the chocolate showed up on Sunday in the form of a pimple. Great. That's one thing about this diet, it really clears up your skin. I haven't had almost any problems with break outs - except when I cheat and eat badly.
The other thing I noticed this week, as I was eating my Birthday dinner... I was eating the rice only because I could. As I had a couple of last bites, I really slowed down and tasted them. Then, I asked myself "Are you really enjoying this or are you eating it because you can? Will you lose anything by stopping?" I discovered that my answers were: I'm eating it because I can and I would lose anything by stopping because I was full.
I ended up doing the same thing with the sherbert - though, I had to ask myself twice before I came up with the right answers to make me stop. I really do have a sweet tooth and I love sherbert.
You know, it's possible for me to break goal #4 before I go visit my parents. I'm shooting for it. Because, I know I'm going to end up cheating like crazy from the 20th to the 31st. So, the more I lose now, the less I'll have to lose later on the backslide.
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 3 December 2001
# of Times Exercised: 1
Current Goal #4: 280 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
Ta-DA! I've reached Goal #3 in a stunning 8 pound drop from last week to this week. I am now at 287. Granted, I'm mildly suspicious but I'm all for rationalization. So, here goes:
The week after Thanksgiving, I had a four pound weight gain. That's was in part due to my food debauchery from the Thanksgiving feast. This was also in part due to my PMS - which is usually under control on the water weight gain side due to the diet but, since I wasn't following, the water weight came back.
The large loss is due to the following factors: I'm done with my period; all dieters know that water weight is easy to gain and lose; I was -really- good this last week; I had LASIK eye surgery - stress is a huge factor in weight loss for me; and I was due for a large drop based the cycle I have been keeping up: 3-4 weeks of small losses then one week of a big loss. At the end of the year, I'll show you the cycle.
In any case, I've made year end goal of Goal #3, 290 pounds. So, I can get my bed. Unfortunately, since my bedroom is -still- a disaster, I'm going to wait until I can get that cleaned up a bit. Also, I'll wait until after the holiday season to avoid the holiday crowds and catch the January sales.
So, Goal #4, 280 pounds will give me the reward of a new PDA/Visor thingy. Yeah! Maybe... if I'm really good, I can reach that before I leave. But, I won't be upset if I don't make it. However, I am going to try.
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 26 November 2001
# of Times Exercised: 1
Current Goal: 290 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
Oh, yes... The Darth Vader theme music cued up as I walked to the scale this morning. (Dum-dum-dum Da De-dum, Da De-dum) Rightly so. You just know there's going to be a weight gain after six days of [food] debauchery. I was fully prepared to accept the consequences of my recent weak will. In fact, I guessed the return weight gain exactly. 4 pounds. I'm back up to 295. There goes a month of being good down the drain (or gullet as the case may be).
Surprisingly, I'm not too upset. Mostly, I suppose, because I knew it was coming and I kept pigging out anyway. I'm not going to say I regret my debauchery but I am going to whine. How come everything yummy is so bad for you? My skin has broken out due to the crap I've been eating. I haven't had that in a couple of months. Plus, my acid tummy is back full force. Just more things for me to remember for later when I'm struggling a bit to be good on my diet.
Holidays suck for diets. My only saving grace is that beginning in January, EVERYONE is going to be on the diet/health/exercise bandwagon. So, do I think I can loose the 6 pounds by December 20th? I don't know but I'm sure going to try. There is a definite incentive to stay on the straight and narrow between now and then.
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 19 November 2001
# of Times Exercised: 4
Current Goal #3: 290 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
On the good side, I've lost another pound. That puts me at 291. On the bad side, I'm getting impatient. I'm only 2 pounds from my year-end goal and I'm starting to ponder cheating to make sure I get it next week. By cheating, I mean not eating on Sunday, so I can ensure a larger weight drop on Monday. This, of course, is a bad thing. It sabotages you for the next week or puts you in a nasty cycle of starving yourself the day before your weigh-in. I won't do that. I'm going to be good.
But, I just want to acknowledge that the urge is there. I know I'm not the only who has these urges from time to time in this success-driven society. But, the best course of action is to continue on the straight and narrow. No cheating. No fudging. No tricks. It's harder to do it honestly but in the end, you will be a lot prouder and happier with yourself for it.
I should have expected a smaller weight drop. I had knocked myself out of ketosis and it takes about four days to get your body back into ketosis. That means, I wasn't in ketosis until like Friday. A pound loss for 3 days is actually pretty good.
But that doesn't stop me from gnashing my teeth and wanting to reach goal #3 as quickly as possible.
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 12 November 2001
# of Times Exercised: 2
Current Goal: 290 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
Well, well, well. Despite my rampant cheating this week (Chocolate on Friday, Pizza on Saturday and La Fondue on Sunday), I still lost another pound! How cool is that? I suspect that this week would have been one of my "big loss" weeks (4-5 pounds) if it hadn't been for all the cheating. Oh, well. A pound is a pound is a pound. 292 with 3 more to go to reach my year end goal. I'm definitely going to go back on the straight and narrow until Thanksgiving.
This last week was also the first time that I really felt -good- while walking. I'm walking faster and stronger with less pain in my left leg. The pain it still there but, it is lessening. Also, I'm starting to -feel- smaller. Granted, my self image is one of me from college... so, looking in a mirror is sometimes a bit of a shock but... that doesn't stop the feeling of being lighter. It's a very cool feeling.
This week was an awesome week for my ego. Friday night, as I was driving Alex to our game, he looked at me and said, "I can tell that you're really loosing weight... and please don't be offended... but I've just noticed that your thighs don't touch the bottom of your steering wheel when you drive anymore." I paused and since it was dark and I couldn't really see, I slipped my hand down to my thigh and discoved... he was right. I could fit my fingers inbetween my leg and the steering wheel! Woo-hoo! Offended? Heck no! I didn't even realize that wasn't squeezing into my car anymore until he told me! Exciting.
The other thing that happened was also Friday night... I got flirted with by a car full of guys! I was headed home, coming off the freeway to a longish light. It was really late, like 2am. I noticed the car that was turning in the opposite direction. I heard the car honk and I looked over. The guy in the passenger seat motioned for me to role down my window. I figured they were lost.
I roll down my window and listen.
Yeah, it was late. Yeah, they were probably drunk. But, they were flirting with me and I'll take it for what it's worth! Besides, what a nice karmic balance to being barked at four weeks or so ago (week 11).
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 5 November 2001
# of Times Exercised: 4
Current Goal: 290 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
Much to my complete astonishment, I lost another pound. That is a total of 30. I'm 293. The reason I am so stunned is that I totally cheated like a man woman this week. Monday was a really bad day, so I decided "Screw it! I'm having pizza! It won't kill me and I won't be surprised when I don't loose weight." I was totally prepared for the consequences of that action.
Turns out, what I really wanted was the cheesy bread. I had a slice of pizza and chowed down on half of the cheesy bread. Tuesday night, I finished the cheesy bread and had spilt pea soup - the only cream soup I can actually have on this diet. Wednesday, Halloween, I indulged in two chocolate chip cookies.
But, I did exercise 4 times this week to make up for it some. So, I'm thinking that helped a little. This means I am only 4 pounds from my year end goal. So, if I'm really good - only 1 to 2 weeks away. Only... I know I'm not going to be good next Sunday. David and Greg and I are all going out to La Fondue on the 11th as a celebration of them still having jobs and as an early celebration of my birthday. There is no way I'm going to be good that night and not indulge in my favorite white chocolate and amaretto fondue. I'm betting I'm going to be sick the next day but, oh, well. *laugh*
The holiday season is the hardest for me. But, I think I'm doing OK for now. I am just planning for my 'feast' days - La Fondue, Thanksgiving, maybe a special meal around my birthday and Christmas.
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 29 October 2001
# of Times Exercised: 2
Current Goal: 290 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
I lost another pound. Yay me! That's 294. Just 5 pounds from my year end goal. I was looking at my progress and, so far, it seems to average about 5 weeks per 10 pounds. All doable. If I kept like that, I'd be under 200 by this time next year. However, I'm not shooting for that. I've decided to be sane and not too over confident. I think I'm going to shoot for 50-60 pounds for the year 2002. I already know that the more weight I loose, the harder it will be to loose the rest.
But, on the fun side of things, I've decided that Goal #4's treat will be a new PDA/Visor/Handspring thingy. I've decided I need one. I have so many email addresses, snail mail addresses, phone numbers and birthdays to keep track of that I can't keep track of them all. Also, I've decide that I really miss my red hair. So, Goal #8's treat will be permission to allow me to start dying my hair again. That will be a great treat for my half way point.
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 22 October 2001
# of Times Exercised: 2
Current Goal: 290 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
I'm in a good mood. I lost 4.5 pounds last week. Very encouraging as compared to the 1/2 pound loss the week before. That puts me just 6 pounds from my end-of-year goal. Believe me, I'm not going to quit once I hit 289. However, I do have to keep in mind that I am going to have two "feast" days before I go to visit my family in December: Thanksgiving and the Birthday Fondue that Greg and David usually take me on. There is no way I'm going to not enjoy myself those two days.
You know what? Feast days are not a crime. As long as they are rare treats for celebrations, I am fully of the mind that they can be enjoyed. Now... it's all of the other holiday parties that you have to look out for.
I did discover two things this past week. First, peanut butter really IS my friend. The last couple of weeks have been pretty hard for me and I couldn't figure out why that was, as compared to the beginning. Then, when I -finally- remembered to take in my new jar of Honey Nut peanut butter (smooth) and actually had it there when I wanted something sweet... my sweet cravings dropped. No, really. They did. It's like a psychology blanket. If I have the sweets I want (peanut butter, Carbolite dark chocolate), I don't crave them. I don't feel deprived because if I really -want- them. I can have them. Strange, huh?
Second, I realized a very obvious "duh" rule about going to things like company picnics and parties. That is: Out of sight, out of mind. I didn't have any problem with wanting to cheat at my company picnic because I filled my plate with 'legal' food, then went to sit with my friends who happened to sit far away from the food (avoiding bees) and when I sat down, I had my back to the food. I didn't do it on purpose. So, while we were all happily munching away, I wasn't sneaking looks at the buffet table, silently wishing to dive into the chocolate brownies. I ate until I was satisfied and I didn't have any illicit thoughts.
It's amazing what you can realize in tips and hints on weight loss when you aren't looking for them.
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 15 Oct 2001
# of Times Exercised: 3
Current Goal: 290 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
Well, I did it... barely. I am under 300 pounds! 299.5 to be exact - but a half pound is a half pound is 1750 excess calories burned off. *happy dance* Goal #2 reached! The only sad thing I've noticed is that if I want to continue to loose 1.5-3.0 pounds a week, I really do have to stick to the much more strict version of the Atkins plan. That means no more than 20-30 carbs per day. Not great, but livable.
I did exercise 3 times this week, too. Mostly because I went out to dinner on Friday and Sunday. Friday night, I was with Laurel. Sunday night, I was with Greg and David. Both nights, we went to Hungry Hunter. Both nights, I invited my companions to walk there and back with me instead of driving. It is only a smidge over a mile. Both times, my companions happily agreed to walk. So, I got my exercise in. That was cool.
But, one not so cool thing did happen. Sunday night, as we were walking back and I was just beginning to think that walking places wasn't such a bad thing to do after all... I got barked at by a car with male teenagers. *sigh* Such a small thing to put such a huge damper on my mood. I know I'm not the most attractive woman around but darn it! why the heck do guys have to be so fricking rude and inconsiderate? I know I wasn't the most polite teenager when I was that age but I was never deliberately cruel.
This one small incident has give me two conflicting emotions to deal with: anger and fear. Anger because I am doing something about my weight and because they were so needlessly cruel. It wasn't right or fair or nice of them to do that to me. Unfortunately, I have no one to vent my anger at this to. Not the culprits anyway.
The second emotion is fear. The reluctant question has become... "What If I lose the weight and they still bark at me?" What if it's not the weight? What if they are telling me that I'm ugly and worthless? You see, my weight has always been an easy barrier to hide behind. 'Oh, they don't like me because I'm fat.' But... what if 'they' don't like me because I'm me? It's a much harder emotion to deal with because it strikes right at the core of my self esteem issues.
Am I being sensitive? Yes. I know it. But, I have reason to be. Hopefully, I'll be able to turn this thing around and start working on being more positive about me and who I am.
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 8 October 2001
# of Times Exercised: 3
Current Goal: 300 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
Happily, I've reached goal #2. 300. Hopefully, next week, I will be under 300 lbs for the first time in years... literally. My true goal for this year has been to be under 290 pounds before I visit my parents for Christmas. I'm within 10 pounds of that goal. 11, actually, to be precise. The thought is really exciting for me. I won't turn away more weight loss than that but, I will be happy with that goal.
It's funny. Now, I'm trying to figure out what treat I should give myself for goal #290. Should I buy my new mattress? Should I buy music? Should I go for a manicure and pedicure? Maybe that. I'm not sure. I'll figure it out over the next week.
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 1 October 2001
# of Times Exercised: 0
Current Goal: 300 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
I wasn't going to say anything this week about my weight loss because there wasn't any. I didn't go up or down. I have to admit my urge to lie about this was huge. When I discovered that I didn't lose anything, I took my slippers off so I could register a 1/2 pound loss. Then, I felt guilty on that because I promised myself that I wouldn't lie. Not to me. Not to anyone. That's when I started thinking about not making my usual weekly entry. Finally, by the time I got to work, I had convinced myself to stick to what I had started.
Honestly, it's not a big deal that I didn't lose anything this week. I was expecting it, sorta, because I didn't exercise and I had been feeling fairly under the weather most of the week. I should be happy that I didn't gain anything. What's the difference between last week and this week? I didn't exercise and I raised my carbs to 40 per day. So, what I'm going to do this week is exercise and stick to the more strict 20 carbs/day. We'll see what happens from that.
It's really hard for me to expose myself like this. But, it's necessary. EVERYONE has an off week in dieting. EVERYONE has plateaus. The Atkins program is working for me but I shouldn't sugar coat any bumps along the way. I am not the only one with problems. I should expose the problem and the solution. So, that's what I'm doing.
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 24 September 2001
# of Times Exercised: 2
Current Goal: 300 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
The Eight Week Review. So, I've been on the Atkins Program for 8 weeks now. I have lost a total of 20 pounds and I've settled into the diet pretty well.
Pros: Easy to maintain. No hunger. Consistent weight loss. No medication. No side effects. Does not require exercise but exercise helps.
Cons: It's expensive - meats and veggies are expensive. It does not teach you how to eat properly for when you go off the program (though, they state this program is for life). Drinking the gallon of water daily will be hard for a lot of people. There is still a -lot- of controversy over the health risks of this diet.
Over all thoughts: If you have the willpower and money, this program is really good. I am never hungry. I eat when I want and as much as I want and there is a steady, consistent weight loss. But, I do miss the carbs in foods like pizza and chips. I think I will be able to stick with it for a long time. Once I do go off of it, I will stick to more of a modified version and if I start to gain weight, move to the strict version for a couple of weeks.
I have to admit, at 303 pounds, I'm getting really excited at being really close to reaching goal #2. I have not been under 300 pounds for years. This will be a huge accomplishment for me. Part of me is still really scared that I'm just fooling myself. Part of me is afraid to hope. Part of me can't help but hope. Losing weight is a very personal and sometimes traumatic thing to deal with. |
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 17 September 2001
# of Times Exercised: 2
Current Goal: 300 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
Got on the scale this morning, ready to wince because of my unexpected early period and the usual water weight gain. Instead of wincing, I got a really nice surprise. 305. I lost 4.5 pounds. I was suspicious. So, I got off the scale and did it again. Same result. Cool! I've lost 18 pounds now in 7 weeks. That's an average of about 2.5 lbs per week. Perfect!
So, I thought about it. I did not cheat at all last week. I did exercise twice. Plus, ever since I've been drinking that gallon+ of water a day, I haven't really had a problem with water retention in my fingers or ankles. Also, I didn't notice it this week. So, super good on diet, exercise and water = decent weight loss. Yah!
Here are some more tips and thoughts on what I do to help stay on my program.
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 10 September 2001
# of Times Exercised: 2
Current Goal: 300 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
Surprisingly enough, despite my cheating from Monday and Tuesday when Cherny was here and me cheating on Saturday at the CtR game, I still lost another 1.5 pounds. Yeah! I'm down to 309.5 and that lets me go order my DVDs. So, my next goal, goal #2, is 300 pounds and my reward will be all the Bujold books on my wishlist. I think that will suffice nicely as a prize.
There are a couple of things I have learned recently. First, I have found a new protein bar that is as good as (and occasionally better than) the Atkins bars. They are called "Carb Solutions" and they all have 2 grams of carbs each. Their flavors that I have found are: Peanut butter and jelly, Chocolate toffee hazelnut and Chocolate almond fudge. They are surprisingly good.
Second, I have discovered that my tastes for certain foods have changed. Saturday, I ended up going over my allotted carb count because I gave into the urge to have one of the hostess snacks that I brought for everyone else. However, it didn't taste nearly as good as I remember them tasting. In fact, it tasted pretty fake and plasticky. It was really weird. I used to -love- the oatmeal cream pies but now, my thought is *ew* because it tasted so yucky.
In a way, it makes me sad, because a lot of my childhood likes are being rewritten. But, in a way, it makes me happy. I really am training myself to eat much better.
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 4 September 2001
# of Times Exercised: 0
Current Goal: 310 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
I'm back from my vacation and all is well. First, yes, I cheated like a mad woman on my diet. All 6 days. Pizza, muffins, French toast, sodas... the works. I tried to be good but, that really didn't would out too well in a gaming/hotel situation. Fortunately for me, I have only gained one pound back. So, I'm back up to 311 and have to work my way back down under 310.
However, I'm not really considering this a loss on my end. Just as Atkins predicted, I had some 'interesting' side effects to going back on that many carbohydrates. I was tired a lot. I was hungry a lot. I had the munchies when I wasn't hungry. I had tummy problems with lactic acid. It was harder for me to sleep. All sorts of interesting observations. It's actually a relief to get back to a regimented diet again.
So, I'm not too upset on the backslide. I gained a pound and learned something valuable.
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 27 August 2001
# of Times Exercised: 2
Current Goal: 310 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
Much to my complete surprise, despite my period last week, not drinking water on the weekend and my minor cheating at the Engineering potluck, I still lost weight. 2 pounds. That's a total of 13 pounds to date and I've reached my first goal of 310 pounds. *cue fanfare and crowd cheering*
Let's see. I feel good. I'm not going hungry and I'm starting to notice changes in my body. I've noticed that my knees hurt less on stairs. That's good. I've noticed a change in my body. My chest is smaller. That's good and bad. *grump* That's the only good thing about being overweight, a decent sized chest. But, as they say, last place to gain weight, first place to lose it.
Although I did reach my first goal, I'm actually not going to make any reward DVD purchases until next week because I'm spending next Friday, Saturday, Sunday and Monday at a Gaming convention. I think I should wait to see if I can make it though the convention without gaining weight. Gaming is where I have the hardest time not munching. I'm going to have to be really good with drinking water and keeping my hands busy.
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 20 August 2001
# of Times Exercised: 2
Current Goal: 310 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
Let's see. Big news this week. Well. I've started exercising. Yep. I've added two 30 minute walks per week. In a couple of weeks, I'll bump it to three 30 minute walks. Then, who knows. Maybe I'll add in the health rider on the days I'm not walking. But, I'm not rushing myself. Especially since I've discovered just how physically out of shape I am. You know... I remember when walking was easy. Piece of cake! Now, oy, by the end of that 30 minutes, I was quietly dying. Both my left ankle and knee were complaining and I was lightly panting and not just from the sun, either!
Also, confession time... I'm sure I went over my 20 carbs yesterday... but you know what? Don't care. Dave cooked some extremely delicious, lightly floured venison. I had 2 pieces and I don't regret it one bit! I had been good... no, excellent... all day on my carbs and I was not going to deprive myself of venison. So, there. *grin*
Then, last night, I really wanted a soda. So, I had one. It bumped me over my 20 carbs per day.
Still. I lost another 1.5 pounds. Whoo-hoo! At this rate, I'll break my third goal by the time I go visit my parents for Christmas. I'm hoping to move it up to 2 pounds per week but I'm happy I'm just continuing to loose weight.
I would like to think that I'm going to break my first goal next week but, due to my cycle, I'm figuring that I'm going to either remain the same or actually gain some weight. That'll suck but it's expected.
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 13 August 2001
# of Times Exercised: 0
Current Goal: 310 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
I've finished week two of the Atkins program and I've lost another 1.5 pounds. Not nearly as exciting as last week but a -lot- more believable. So, if I can keep a downward trend of 2-3 pounds a week, that will be excellent. I think I'll add exercise this week in the form of walking.
Also, this week, I had my first really bad carbohydrate craving this week. Thursday night, I was watching TV and a pizza commercial came on. It started me thinking about pizza, of course, and my favor part of any pizza - the crust. For a moment, I could almost literally taste the pizza crust - hot, chewy, crunch bread. I was drooling at the thought. It was the hardest thing in the world to turn, drink a lot of water and munch on some of my special chocolate bars until the craving went away.
The discoveries never cease on this Atkins Program. I had my first encounter with protein bars this week. I figured that protein bars might be a good lo-carb way to go to eat in a hurry. Unfortunately for me it all didn't go so well. Fortunately for me, I tried a couple of different kinds. Here are my results. Note - have a LARGE glass of water with each bar. You'll need it.
"Pure Protein" brand. 10 carbs per bar. Taste: Sweetened dog food. How gross can you get? I mistakenly thought "More carbs than the others, it probably tastes better." Oh, foolish, foolish mortal. Out of a 1-10, I give these bars a 2.
"Ultimate Lo Carb2" brand. 3 carbs per bar. Taste: Lightly sweetened foo. In other words, it doesn't really taste like anything. There is a vague taste of sweet and the flavor it is supposed to taste like but, in essence, it's like chewing flavorless gum. The consistency isn't too bad, though. Not grainy. A little dry. Out of a 1-10, I give these bars a 5. Eatable but not pleasurable. They will do to fill a hunger.
"Atkins Advantage" brand. 2.6 carbs per bar. Taste: Lightly sweetened something. The best of the bunch that I tried with, surprisingly, the least amount of carbs. The taste is acceptable but not necessarily yummy. At least, there is a flavor and it's not dog food. Good consistency and not -too- dry. You won't be taking a drink of water after EVERY bite of the bar. Just most of them. Best taste and satisfaction of the three. Out of a 1-10, I give these bars a 6. Good enough. You won't be cringing at the thought of eating them. Filling and occasionally tasty. I'll even go so far as to give the flavor Lemon Chiffon a 7. It was actually fairly good.
However, on the good side of things, I have discovered that Hansen's diet Black Cherry soda is fabulous! No carbs. No calories. No aspartame. No caffeine. It's yummy, sweet and pretty decent for being a soda. Definitely a treat for when you've drunk all the water you can stand.
|
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date: 6 August 2001
Current Goal: 310 |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
Well, this first week really wasn't all that bad. I was sure to eat all I wanted, when I wanted, though I made sure I was really hungry and not just bored. I'm not really feeling deprived at all. So, far. I've noticed that I've started craving more veggies and less cheese. That's good I suspect. I'm having a lot easier time drinking the water as well. Over all, I was pretty sure that this wasn't going to work because I was having too easy a time of it.
I got on the scale this morning. It's been one week since I started the
Atkins program. This was the test to see if I was going to pay for eating so
well or if the hype was true. The slide started at 323 and the balance was
heavy. *hrm* For a lark, I slide it 320. Still way heavy. 318. Still
heavy. 316. Starting to shift as if almost balanced. 315. Balanced.
315. I lost 8 pounds?
My emotions jumped all over the place. Happiness and astonishment were
replaced by suspicion. No way. I ate like crazy over the last week and I
lost 8 pounds? 1-2 was expected. 3-4 would have made me happy. 5-6 would
have made me ecstatic. 7-8 makes me suspicious. Why such a big drop? Is
this a water weight thing? I had weighed myself on Monday morning, just like
last week.
I don't want to look a gift horse in the mouth but realistically, I know
there must be other factors involved. I wore my nightgown instead of a
towel. I was coming off my period. It's the first week of a diet program.
Etc... Still. I lost 8 pounds. *grin* Let's hope that the trend keeps
going. Maybe not as dramatic but still in the same downward direction.
I have learned a couple of lessons in the past week, too. |
|
WEEKLY STATS
Date:
# of Times Exercised:
Current Goal: |
NOTES/THOUGHTS
|